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In the last one hundred years the boundaries and definitions of what makes a good relationship have been stretched and distorted into so many new and exciting shapes – some good and some awful. So what ‘makes’ a relationship work for you? And what’s more, what could you do to make the relationship that you are in now – even better?

Could you seek more pleasure, better communication, more companionship or a better sex life from your partner? Well, hypnotherapy may be what you both are looking for to help you to achieve all of these goals and more.

Within sessions of hypnotherapy, you would realize that over time, your mate will respond subconsciously and will also improve your relationship, even if he/she is not participating actively in dealing with the present issues that you are trying to improve! This means that even if your other half is not interested in going with you for therapy, they can still be affected by it and change for the better. If this is the case you will just be shown techniques that will allow your partner to take notice of the process and want to join in.

There are many issues that can “Rock the Boat” when it comes to relationships, however if the reason that you are looking at this article is because you feel that your relationship could be improved, then let me congratulate you on deciding to use hypnotherapy!

Hypnosis can help you make dramatic changes in your attitude which will ultimately improve your relations with others. And amazingly, - as YOU make these dramatic changes, your partner will respond unconsciously, and together you will co-create better communication and rapport.

If this is a bit technical for you, in basic terms it means that hypnosis is effective in dealing with the way we think about things. Thinking is powerful, everything starts with a thought! People that have different perceptions normally have different ideas and views about things.

By improving this type of communication you can completely change your relationships for the better! And this is not all. You will also have a tool to help you to achieve the life of your dreams for both you and your partner.

Because hypnotherapy uses the natural processes of the mind and body, you will be amazed just how quickly you will see the benefits! Remember, relationships are not about – big houses, nice cars or even exotic holidays, but they are about two people living and enjoying life as one.

With a little guidance and time you can truly build a beautiful relationship, now isn’t that what you deserve?

Need help from an expert? Meet the man who has been on Opera and has helped thousands in their relationships. Click here

Maria consulted with me because she was frustrated about the distance she felt in her relationship with her husband, Carl. He wanted to be close to her, but she didn’t feel close to him.

“I think the problem is that he often talks to me in a judgmental or condescending way. He sounds like a parent rather than a partner. I just hate being spoken to like that.”

“How do you respond when he speaks to you like that?” I asked.

“I withdraw and feel badly. Then later I sometimes try to talk with him about it, but he doesn’t know what I’m talking about. He thinks I’m too sensitive and that I just want to blame him.”

How often have you had the experience of not knowing what to say in conflict? Later, after thinking about it, you think of all the things you wish you would have said. Then you go back to your partner to try to deal with the issue, only to discover that it’s too late - your partner doesn’t understand what you are talking about.

“Maria, imagine that the part of you that hates being spoken to like Carl speaks to you is a small child. Would you let him speak to a child like that?”

“No. Actually, I don’t let him speak to our children like that. He speaks to them with kindness and caring because he knows that I will say something if he is mean to them.”

“So you stand up for your children in the moment, but you don’t stand up for yourself, for the child within you, in the moment?”

“Yeah. I just never know what to say.”

“What do you say to him later?”

“I tell him I didn’t like his tone of voice. But he isn’t aware of it.”

“Right. He will be aware of it only if you say it in the moment. Most people are not aware of their tone of voice. When you tell him about it later, he really doesn’t know what you are talking about. You need to be responding in the moment for him to hear his own voice. You need to be saying something like, ‘ Carl, I hate it when you speak to me in that judgmental, parental voice. I don’t feel like being with you when you talk to me like that.’ You have a much better chance of him understanding what you are saying when he can hear his own voice in the moment. And you will feel much better when you speak up for yourself in the moment. You will not feel so much like withdrawing when you are not abandoning yourself in the face of his judgmental tone.”

While Maria certainly didn’t like Carl’s tone of voice, her distance from him was more due to her self-abandonment than to his behavior. As long as she was being a victim and not taking care of herself in the moment, she was feeling badly. It’s easy to blame Carl and think that her feelings are his fault, but her feelings were really the result of not taking loving care of herself around Carl.

Marie started to speak up, not blaming Carl but just letting him know her truth. To her great surprise and delight, he finally began to understand what she was saying. He was actually a caring person and just didn’t realize that he was being parental and judgmental. The more Marie responded in the moment and spoke her truth, the better things got between them. Carl wasn’t perfect, but Marie found that when she spoke up instead of withdrew, they were able to deal with the issue in the moment. She also discovered that the more she took care of herself in the moment instead of being a victim – with Carl and with her friends and family - the more respect Carl had for her. Some of his judgment toward her was coming from his frustration over her not speaking up for herself with her family and friends!

Need help from an expert? Meet the man who has been on Opera and has helped thousands in their relationships. Click here

The term ‘making love’ has different meanings to different people. In general, in human nature, on TV shows and in movies, the term making love is used to define a tender moment of intimacy between two people. Yes, it usually indicates the act of intercourse, but it is supposedly describing it in a more substantial and meaningful way. The term making love is supposedly meant to imply something beautiful, something romantic ~ to create love. It is used to intentionally deter from giving the vision or thought of sex as being something obscene.

The term ‘making love’ wasn’t always used to depict the actual act of having sex. It was used to describe something more pure and even innocent. In the old days, the words ‘making love’ were used to describe any romantic, intimate gesture. Something as simple as a kiss, a flirtation, an expression of devotion, or even a dance was defined as ‘making love’. Times sure have changed, haven’t they? The days of wine and romance seem to be long gone, but for some of us, the words ‘making love’ still hold a special meaning.

Everyone at one time or another has probably been told, or they themselves have said to another – I’m not just having sex with you, I’m making love with you. Of course, those statements are not always made with the utmost genuineness. It tends to give the term a bad name when used in those circumstances. But hopefully, common sense or gut instinct will let you know when it’s not being said to you in all sincerity. If not, and you realize at a later time, chalk it up to experience. Live and learn, then move on and acknowledge the lesson.

But hopefully you have a partner who does acknowledge the significance of the words ‘making love’ in their true sense. It should be an intimate and passionate experience. Making love, in the actual sense of the term, can be one of the most fulfilling exchanges of trust between two people. So choose your words wisely people, for tomorrow they may come back to haunt you.